Who are we to judge?

Why do I choose the topics I choose? I wish I could tell you that it’s a well thought out, sensible, systematic, intelligent process. In the end, it’s whatever pops into my head when I open my laptop. There may have been some forethought, but trust me, that was by accident. The city versus country dilemma has been one that has plagued me throughout my life. I have moved more times than Elizabeth Taylor was married; Elizabeth and I may have shared the same affliction: not truly knowing what we want. Do I want to live in the center of a vibrant, loud, culture-rich city or would I prefer a quiet hamlet where people and theater are scarce?

Not all of us can have both. Not all of us want both. But what if you can only have one, which one would you choose?

The Beginning

I was born in a big city. After 18 years of hustle, bustle, and grit, I moved to a small town in North Carolina. Don’t ever shock your system this way. I was so depressed I started dating women to feel better. Seriously, I couldn’t see the forest through the rednecks. After a couple years working at a cotton mill, I packed up my ’77 Nova and hightailed it back to the city. After arriving in Brooklyn, I stopped to buy a drink and my car was completely cleaned out; I think the thief left a broken 45. Thus the beginning of my country versus city struggle.

Everybody Has An Opinion

We live in an age where so many people think they know better. I caution you to listen to your own heart and mind. People can give out advice and share their own experiences, but no one knows you like you know you. I love when people pose a question about “the best place to live in Portugal.” So many will weigh-in telling people they “should” live here or there for whatever reason. I see these places quickly become ghettos of like-minded people. Explore, think outside the box, expand your comfort zone; you may end up very pleasantly surprised.

Alternate Choices, Change it up, Be a Nomad

I remember contemplating where I would live in Portugal. I was with a friend going on and on: what if I don’t like it, what if I buy an apartment in a city I end up hating, what if, what if? Here’s how Gina replied, “Then you’ll move.” Why did such a simple solution not occur to me?

Got me thinking . . . perhaps I can live in the center of a city for a while and then move to the country for a change. That’s what I thought when I purchased my condo. Once I arrived in the Algarve I realized how easy it is to get around and how close I would be to wide open, quiet, outside-of-the-city places. And hotels and airbnbs are less than half the usual cost off-season. The beauty of the Algarve is that the weather is magnificent most of the year. I can have both city and country without ever moving.

Vacation homes can be a royal pain in the ass. My place in Pennsylvania was delightful, but it was a lot of work and came with complicated issues. After that experience I decided that owning one home is enough, unless you can pay a person or company to manage it and even then it can be problematic.

Compromise

For me, compromise is exactly where I landed. For six years, I have lived in a small city that has everything I need. Please do not think me boastful as I tell you about my current situation. It is merely to point out that if you are determined to find what is right for you, it’s out there. I currently have all I need.

From my terrace I see the Ria Formosa and the Atlantic Ocean and from my marquise (enclosed terrace) in the back of my apartment, I see mountains of Estoi (mountains I can drive to in 25 minutes). I have a terrace garden with succulents and herbs, I am surrounded by four schools and young people, I can walk to cafés — there is even one in my building, restaurants, grocery stores, and other shops, and I have great neighbors. There is a jazz club 10 minutes away by foot and a movie theater about 30 minutes walking. So why would I ever consider leaving you might ask? Damn, that’s a good question! My constant yearning for something else makes me crazy. Note: I do not take what I have for granted.

I have learned that isolation would be very bad for me. Isolation is probably what I would experience in the country. The bottom line . . . learn who you are.

“The same things go on everywhere, whether you’re from the city, the country or wherever.“
Bubba Sparxxx (not a typo)

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Future Travel

A couple of short local trips to Spain and parts of the Algarve coming up soon; an Iceland cruise by way of Northern Europe in May; Oslo, Norway with Paco for all of July (with visits from friends); a much anticipated trip to the Puglia region of Italy in the spring of 2025. The United States sometime in 2025 is likely: Brooklyn, Florida, Portland, Maine, Maryland, and North Carolina. I can now fly direct from Faro to Newark, thanks to a new United route. I booked a Mediterranean cruise for October 2025 — it sails from Tel Aviv, so it’s a bit uncertain. It includes parts of Turkey and Egypt I have not yet explored.

State-of-Mind

I’m in a weird space these days. I’m in between travel, home projects, and an assessment of my current health. It’s part of my nature to be concerned about everything and I’m trying to just enjoy the moment. Planning is good, but overplanning can put you in a box, making spontaneity difficult. I’m asking my good friends to remind me to relax. Now you cannot accuse me of not asking for help when I need it.

Thank you again to all of you who gave me feedback on the continuation of my blog. It gives me great pleasure to write and share my thoughts.

Please forgive typos and grammatical errors; proofreading is the part I detest.